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Showing posts from April, 2018

A Season of Grief

  There is one thing I have been most afraid of my entire life, I have had a fear of death…and not just for myself, for those who are closest to me. It’s not because I fear that there isn’t a God who promises life eternal in heaven or that deep down I don’t believe I’m saved. I think it’s more to do with a fear there will be pain in dying, and being a highly emotional person, I fear the brevity of my emotions. So when my sister was first diagnosed with stage four cancer, I was suddenly forced to grapple what I had long feared the most, the potential of loosing a loved one. The confronting realisation that all of us will die, our lives are in God’s hands, and none of us know how long we have to live in this world. It was taking an abstract biblical truth and then putting flesh and bones on it. A lot of big emotions ran through me on a daily basis, and at first I found it to be a very confusing time as my relationship with my sister was very close but at times complicated. Cancer in ...

Self Care

  Once upon a time there was a woman (a mother in fact) who was feeling so tired and run down that the only thing that encouraged her to keep on going was her great love for her family. With every need she felt a tug on her compassionate heart. With every chore, she wanted to provide a home of safety, warmth and comfort. With every tear, she wanted to be that shoulder to cry on. As days rolled into months, rolled into years, she felt the well of love for her family begin to slowly deplete. What once was over-flowing became ever close to empty. No matter how much she tried to just continue living on love, droplets of frustration, exhaustion and discouragement began to fill her well. When the needs of her loved ones confronted her each day, instead of meeting them with patience and kindness, she felt herself quickly turning to anger (an emotion that she hated, yet felt powerless to oppose).   Then one day in utter despair, she confided in a friend her growing concern that the c...